This is episode 50 of the Surrogacy Podcast, another Khale series episode with Katrina Hale, and it makes sense that with celebrating episode 50 we discussed milestones and rituals in surrogacy.
You might think a baby shower or birthday is a pretty straight-forward and simple affair, celebrating the parents and child, but like all things in surrogacy, it’s more complex than that. Lots of milestones – pregnancy and birth announcements, baby showers, birthdays, Mother’s and Father’s Day, the day of Parentage Order – they can all carry significance for the intended parents and the surrogate and her family, for different reasons. For many reasons, these days can trigger the ‘fear of abandonment’ in a surrogate, or the ‘fear that she’ll keep the baby’ in the intended parents. Many surrogates survive these events ‘white-knuckled,’ not wanting to be the centre of attention, but wanting some acknowledgement of their contribution and sacrifice as well.
If you are entering a surrogacy arrangement, you will need to complete surrogacy counselling with a qualified counsellor.
Katrina has previously appeared on the Podcast at Episode 32. She has also created a list of Twenty Things to Think About When Choosing Your Surrogacy Relationship.
Katrina Hale appears in several episodes of the Podcast, and you can listen to other episodes of the Khale Series.
If you are considering becoming a surrogate, you can read more about that here.
You can hear stories from intended parents and surrogates on the Surrogacy Podcast.
You can find all the details of the surrogacy laws that apply to you.
You can also purchase my book, More Than Just a Baby: A Guide to Surrogacy for Intended Parents and Surrogates, the only guide to surrogacy in Australia.
I’ve written about the milestones and celebrations of surrogacy. And Katrina and I have spoken before about how best to manage our fears in surrogacy.